Is it Time to Introduce Someone New to Your Life?

I grew up in a family as the only boy among four girls, which may explain why, when it was time for me to become a parent, I put in my order for "boys only." As much as I grew to adore my sisters, I knew what it was like to grow up in a female-centered home and I was determined that my new family would be different.

So I was very thankful when my order was fulfilled as requested and I was granted two wonderful sons, Kaleim and Rezwan, who have become two extraordinary men. But over the years, my views on having more of a female presence in the family have softened and I admit to feeling some regret at not having had a daughter.

And now I do. When my eldest son Kaleim married Liz last summer, I remember feeling quite emotional as I watched her saying her vows. I "got" it then. I got that she "got" my son in a very profound way, and I realized that I was not getting a daughter­-in-law, I was gaining a ­daughter­-in-law. And if I were to put in an order for a daughter, she is everything I would have asked for: bright, spirited and committed.

What has really stood out for me in the months since is how her presence has affected our family dynamic in such a positive way. My sons and I have always been quite close, and they have always been very close to each other. In a small tight-knit family like ours, it could have been very easy for a new person coming in to have a disruptive effect and to be seen as a dividing force.

It is a credit to Liz that the opposite is true. The brothers are as close as ever, and the time we spend together as a family has become even richer. If anything, she has been a uniting force, as her energy has added a new dimension to our lives that makes us all see each other in new ways, and in new roles. Kaleim is now a devoted husband, Rezwan has a sister, and I finally have a daughter. Liz has brought an exciting new element to our lives together. We are, in a sense, reborn as a family.

The lesson I see here is that often one of the most rejuvenating things you can do in your life is to let another human being into it. That's true in dental practices too, whether you're talking about opening the door to an educational mentor or a new addition to the team. I have heard many dentists resist the idea of growing their practice because they don't want to introduce someone new and risk "ruining what we have."

But if you bring in the right person—someone with the right values and philosophy that align with yours—you can find that just that infusion of new energy can lift everyone and create an even stronger team dynamic. If things are feeling stagnant in your professional world, I suggest putting in an order for that person right away.