How Should I Feel?

It's official, there is now another Manji in our family and I couldn't be prouder. My son Kaleim and his wonderful bride Liz were married this weekend – and with all respect to the Davison family, I have to say I love the sound of "Liz Manji." It has a nice ring to it.

This last week in Vancouver for the wedding was a swirl of emotions for me.

The ceremony of course was cause for great excitement and celebration. There was also an amazing honoring of my late wife, Shahinool. I got to see many old friends and relatives I haven't seen in awhile, which filled my heart with joy. People came from Tanzania and Kenya, from Germany and London, and from all over North America.

There were close to 150 guests, including two of my uncles who are 86 years old and who made the 12-hour journey to be there, which is a great testament to the strength of the bonds of family.

But life and the love of family can also bring its share of sadness and bittersweet moments of realization. My first cousin was recently diagnosed with a brain tumor, and my stepfather is in a rehab center after a stroke. Both of them face an uncertain future. My heart goes out to them. Then there is my dad, who is alive and well at 86, but who seems more frail every time I see him.

It was like seeing the cycle of life played out in front of me among my loved ones, and as I say, it brought out a lot of conflicting emotions.

I think that in times like that we need to embrace all of the emotions we are feeling – the joy and happiness as well as the sadness and loss, the passion and excitement and as well as the concern and anxiety.

That said, it doesn't mean that you should allow your state of mind to always be pulled in different directions, or to be ruled by your emotions. It just means acknowledging these feelings for what they are: evidence that we are alive and we are human. And that is a great thing.

Personally, l like to begin my day with a brief prayer and meditation, where I can examine whatever I am feeling at the moment, acknowledge those feelings, and then get my mind centered where I want it. I give thanks for what I have, which gives me a sense of contentment. And I give thanks for what I am about to have, because that keeps me passionate about my future.

I recommend taking a mental timeout every day to perform this exercise. It's a great way to condition your mind and guide your thoughts, to acknowledge the power of your feelings, as well as the power you have to create new ones. And it's amazing how, once you have that clarity and purity of purpose – events just seem to align in your favor.