As a parent, I spent a lot of time when my sons were young trying to get them to do things for their own good. Whether it was doing their homework and studying for tests, or keeping their rooms clean, or any number of obligations they had. My wife and I used the carrot and stick approach (and everything in between) to keep them on track. That's what parenting is about; you have to do a lot of "babysitting" even long after they stop being babies.

Except when it came to them getting their driver's licences. In that case, my sons (who both love cars) somehow managed to keep themselves accountable. They counted down the minutes to their 16th birthdays, and they studied dutifully for their driving tests—on their own. No reminders necessary. No babysitting required. Why? The answer is obvious: It meant more to them than it did to us.

So what about your patients? If you hand someone a card with their next appointment time and then follow up with a postcard, voicemail, text message, and after all that you're still not 100 percent sure they are coming, you're babysitting. You are trying to coax them to do something that is really important to them.

The answer to get out of the babysitting role is to get patients to the point where their appointments and oral health means at least as much to them as it does to you.

I know this sounds easier said than done; however, it is possible to achieve over time. It's a big part of what value creation is all about. This is not just giving patients a date for their next hygiene visit, but also talking with them about WHY their hygiene schedule is so important. This is also conveying what it can mean to their overall oral health and coaching patients on the idea that each one of their visits involves several professionals and an operatory being reserved for their care. This is why appointments are treated as confirmations. It's about getting at least a partial financial commitment up front on large cases for the simple reason that people value what they have already made an investment in.

It may take some time to train patients to see your higher value as something they want and to take ownership for their own care. But when they do, a mind-shift will take place. They will stop thinking of visits to your office as something they are doing for you. They will recognize how this is something they must do for themselves. Create the right value and establish the right expectations, and you not only get to deliver a higher level of dentistry, but you also get to retire from babysitting forever.